Have you read the book The Courage to be Disliked?
“Oh, but being alone isn’t what makes you feel lonely.”
In Kishimi and Koga (2013), the philosopher shares wisdom that resonates deeply with my own experiences of being excluded from social cliques. The feeling of being left out of social groups can have a negative impact on people, leading them to believe that they are just not good enough and feelings of self-doubt creep in.
The philosopher states, “Loneliness is having other people, society, and community around you, yet having a profound sense of being excluded from them” (Kishimi & Koga, 2013, p. 52).
It can also be an opportunity for people to become better versions of themselves. Let me share with you an example of when I became excluded from social groups.
When I quit drinking three years ago, my life totally transformed for the better, but I also lost a lot of connections.
I was suddenly left out of social events at my workplace and outside of work; I felt like a total stranger.
On the bright side, my health improved a bit more, and I started investing more time in creative projects and activities that gave me purpose. Overall, I've learned to surround myself with people who value my authenticity, without feeling the pressure to conform to someone else’s expectations.
In the event that you are experiencing a similar situation, this book has become one of my favs.
Thank you for stopping by, and have a wonderful week! ♡
Sincerely,
Clari♡ from The Cafecito Diaries ☕️📝 | 💌 hello@claribotello.com
Disclaimer: This post is provided for educational and informational purposes only. This post does not constitute providing medical advice or professional services.
This week’s newsletter was originally posted on Substack Notes on Saturday, January 4th, 2025. Posting on notes feels very similar to posting on social media platforms to me. I might remove it from notes, or post less on it to focus more on my newsletters.
